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Dear Auntie Char

Dear Auntie Char

My husband and I are raising four beautiful children. Our oldest daughter, age 15, has admitted to us that she has been drinking alcohol at parties on weekends. She says she never gets drunk but always has one drink because "everyone else is doing it" and she doesn't want to look "weird."

My husband and I never drink. Alcohol is not served in our home. Our daughter is an honor student and never has caused us any trouble. She says we should appreciate her honesty and not be angry with her. How should we handle this?

— Beside Ourselves in Bebek

Dear Beside,

It is extremely difficult when a child you love admits to worrying problems. I'm sure you only want the best for her, and are scared that she might hurt herself. Please keep in mind that it took a lot of courage for her to tell you about the drinking. Considering your lifestyle, I'm sure she knew that you and your husband would not be in favor of it. Try to lovingly show her the errors of what she is doing: besides being illegal, it is a dangerous position to put yourself in. Then give her some practical advice on how to avoid situations like that. Maybe she could appoint herself to be the designated driver, so she would have a legitimate reason to refuse alcohol. Or she could organize her own parties with people she trusts who would not pressure her into doing anything she does not want to do. Whatever course you decide to take, let her know that you love her and will continue to love her even if she makes bad choices.
-Auntie

Dear Auntie Char

I have many close friends in my school. We all have unlocked lockers in our PE locker room. My friends feel quite comfortable to take things from my locker—my school uniform shirt, my coat, my deodorant—and use them. I don’t mind, but I wish they would put the things back where they found them. I have received two discipline slips because I cannot find my uniform shirt. What can I do to get them to respect my property and my need for “boundaries?”

–Frustrated in Ferikoy

Dear Frustrated,

It is always a difficult dilemma when you have to decide where the line is between, acceptable behavior as friends and taking advantage. I'm sure you don't want to hurt your friends' feelings, but you have a legitimate reason for complaint. First find out who is taking what on a regular basis. If it is the same people regularly pilfering your things, take them aside and gently explain your situation. Set some ground rules, such as always having to ask permission to borrow things. Don't attack them for their actions, but clearly state your situation. Another thing you could do, is not leave your things at school if they are regularly being taken. If you have your uniform shirt at home, you know you won't be caught unawares on a uniform day.
-Auntie Char

Dear Auntie Char

I have a lot of homework every night. At the same time, I want to spend time with my friends, participate in extra-curricular activities, and use Facebook. If I don’t get on Facebook every night, I feel left out. At the same time, I think I’m wasting a lot of time and it is one way I could make better use of my time. What do you suggest?

-- Lonely in Libadiye

Dear Lonely,

Time management is one of those unfortunate things we all have to deal with, whether we are in high school or not. It can be difficult to decide what to give our attention to. First of all, you need to prioritize. Homework is your main responsibility as a student, so if one of your extracurricular activities is keeping you from completing everything on time, you may need to consider dropping it. You could stagger what you do outside of school, especially since many activities only last for one semester. For example, you could play soccer in the first semester, and be in the play in the second. As for Facebook, while it is a wonderful thing that can be very addictive, it should not be your main priority. Set a time limit for yourself. it can be tempting to check your notifications, and then sit around for a while waiting for something to happen. Give yourself long enough to check the latest updates and then sign off. If you prioritize how you spend your time, life will go much more smoothly.
-Auntie Char

Facebook: Generational Fad or Universal Phenomenon

"I believe kids can do better in school and sleep earlier if there's no Facebook!"

Facebook is known as many things: a social networking site, a virtual catch-all for every person you have ever met, or a time-wasting-brain-cell-killing technological black hole. One thing it cannot be labeled as, however, is an age specific blip in popular culture. Since its genesis in 2004, Facebook has grown from a cool website for preppy college students to a necessary aspect of life for man, woman and child. In a recent survey done at a small, private school, of the 144 people surveyed, 81% admitted to having a Facebook account, and this included middle school students through faculty.

What is the universal appeal of Facebook? In the survey, the two most popular features were the Wall, where a user can write messages to their friends, and the Photos. Informally, quite a few of those surveyed admitted that they really just used it to keep tabs on their friends. As an international community where most of the students and staff are living away from their home countries, this makes a lot of sense. Before Facebook, it was impossible to maintain friendships that spanned multiple continents. Now, at the click of a button, you can find out what your friend are thinking about, what they have done recently, and what their scores are on Pirates versus Ninjas, or one of a host of other games provided by the website.

Interestingly, while the older generations have been Facebook’s harshest critics, there are also a fair number of them jumping onto the bandwagon. They use it for many of the same reasons their younger counterparts do: to keep up with each other and enjoy the interesting features Facebook has to offer. Amusingly, even a number of senior citizens have utilized it, who enjoy reconnecting with old friends, and keeping an eye on their grandchildren, among other things. However, these adults still tend to be the most critical of Facebook. “Facebook is a huge time-waster and encourages self-absorption,” said one school parent and Facebook user. Many parents complain that their children waste time that they could be using to study or build meaningful “real” friendships. Even many students (and young teachers) admitted that Facebook allows many people to bypass personal relationships and hide behind virtual ones.

Facebook should be used responsibly. The purpose of it is to facilitate the growth of already existing relationships, not replace them with shallow, virtual substitutes. Users should also take advantage of the security options which are not available on other mediums, such as Myspace. Selectivity as to who can be your Facebook “friend” and view your personal information is advised. However, if Facebook is used with the appropriate safeguards, it can be a very helpful resource.

What do I think about Facebook?

It is amusing to me how Facebook had become so controversial, and so wide spread. Usually, I've found the older generations are more wary of it, while the younger generation often refuses to see any potential downsides to it. I'm not so naive as to say that Facebook is perfect, but I love how it keeps me in touch with people. I have friends spanning the globe: old friends and new friends, who I would find it very difficult to keep track of. With Facebook, I can see what is happening with my childhood friend in London, my aunt in Houston, and my friends in Malaysia. Without Facebook, I would have lost touch with most of these people long ago. My security settings are pretty high, so I have control over who sees what, so I feel safe putting my personal information on the internet.

Besides keeping in touch with long lost friends, Facebook helps me keep track of happenings where I am. I use Facebook to ask my teachers questions, plan events with my friends, make sure I am up to date with all the news in our community. Facebook can be difficult to pull away from, and I have had trouble limiting my time on it so that I wouldn't waste my time. But the benefits far outweigh the drawbacks, in my opinion.

Test 3 Essay

I have heard many cynics say that it is far too optimistic to think that people are primarily motivated to do things out of the kindness of their hearts. To an extent I agree with them: if left without a moral compass, we would all tend toward evil, not good. To say that conscience is not as powerful a motivator as wealth or power, however, is a sweeping statement that deserves criticism. I believe that there is a Higher Power which directs our conscience, sometimes against our nature, toward good. I see it all the time in people I know; people who have given up wealth, power and comfort in order to serve others. Especially in the cases of Susan and David.

David was successful, to say the least. He was a straight A student with lots of potential. He went to Yale University and graduated with honours from their Business school. After graduation he worked for an affluent organization on a monthly salary of six thousand dollars. He was making lots of money and moving up the corporate ladder: everything was going for him. He was not satisfied with what he was doing, however. As a Chinese American he would often think of the country his family came from, of the people there and how poor and hopeless they were. So he quit his job and moved to China to work with the poor. He helped them build businesses and offered them Hope they had never had before. He gave up money and increasing power because his conscience directed him toward helping others. He has never been happier.

Susan was a well-off, comfortable woman from Seattle. She had a great job and lots of friends. Everyone loved Susan: she was warm, loving and always willing to serve others. She had lots of friends who traveled and lived all over the world, living with the natives and doing humanitarian work. Over a long period of time, she began to feel her conscience prick. She was so comfortable with her nice job and great friends, when so many people had nothing. The example of her friends showed her that there were other options for her. So she made a decision that shocked everyone: She moved to A----------. Many people thought she was crazy for going to such a difficult place, but she knew she was doing the right thing, so it did not matter. She moved to one of the most dangerous parts of the country and taught at a girls' school, to try and raise literacy among them. A year after she moved their, she was kidnapped and killed. It was incredibly hard to lose someone close to me in that way. It was the first time something like that had happened to me. But her example is very powerful to me. It convicts me that comfort and money and power are not important. Being willing to give up everything, even your life, for a higher cause is the most noble thing you can do.

Both David and Susan are significant models to me. Through their lives they have taught me what is truly important in life. And it is not money or power or fame. When those cynics sneer at the idea of conscience being more powerful, I point to David and Susan. They prove that the world may not be as hopelessly heartless as the cynics would like us to believe.

Murphy's Law

Murphy's Law states that "if anything can go wrong, it will, and at the worst possible moment." Some people (who obviously live in some sort of utopia) scoff at Murphy's Law, claiming that it absurd, unscientific and cannot be proved. I, however, have found ample proof that the Law is living and active.
When I was a little girl, our family lived in the former USSR. Life was not glamorous by any means, but we usually had most of the things we needed. The things we didn't need, we learned to live without. To make matters worse, we lived in a minority neighbourhood--the poorest in our city.

One fateful winter, the corrupt officials in our city decided that they didn't want to waste precious resources on minority neighbourhoods. Winters in our city were bitterly cold. But they decided to cut off our gas. We had to learn how to keep warm by wrapping layer upon layer of clothing around our frigid bodies. That cut was not enough for our lovely corrupt officials, however, so they decided to limit our running water as well. And our electricity. When it rains, it pours.

We got through that winter intact. It was not pleasant, but we survived. Through it, Murphy's Law was more than proven.

SAT practice essay #2

Evenings in my household generally look identical from one night to the next. Once homework and dishes are out of the way, we settle down to amuse ourselves. Fifty years ago, this may have involved gathering in the den, reading books, playing games or watching the Ed Sullivan show together. But in this glorious modern age it overwhelmingly involves individual, mindless entertainment. My Dad might be back in his study, watching a television show on his computer. My brother might be in his room, watching something on his television. In the living room, my mother and I can be found on two separate computers, checking Facebook or writing our friends or just lazily browsing the internet. On the upside, we are each caught up on what is happening in the world, whether it be the real one, or a fictional one we choose to lose ourselves in. On the other hand, we are wasting precious time.

The advances that make such high-tech entertainment options widely available, have stolen time which we should be dedicating to worthier investments. As a junior in high school, I will be leaving home in two years to go to college. I should be working hard to enjoy every last minute with my parents and brother before I leave them: I have a feeling I will regret giving up time to goof off with my brother so I could watch the latest episode of Psych. It is too easy to find that you have wasted hours on nothing when you could have spent it on the people you love.

Another drawback, for me personally, is the lessening value of the written word. Words are cheap nowadays. All you have to do is open up Google and you have millions of options at your fingertips. Maybe I’m old fashioned, but I love the experience of going to a library or a bookstore, holding a book in my hands and pouring over the rich storehouses of literary treasure. Who would have thought that turning a page with my own fingertips would be a sensation missed. Books are personal; the time and emotion put into them by the author is more tangible. Along the same lines, technology has made letter writing obsolete. I am proudly of the generation that pioneered texting, instant messaging and email but I still get a thrill when I read a note someone wrote with their own hand.

Technology is cold. It has made our lives easier, but it has encouraged frigid individualism. Family time, book-reading, and letter writing are things which we should not let die. Technological advances are wonderful, but our lives would still be good without them.

Karzai Opponent Withdraws Amid Controversy

The opposing candidate to President Hamid Karzai in the current Afghan runoff election officially withdrew, asserting fears of fraud in the election process.
The candidate, Dr. Abdullah Abdullah, withdrew from the polls amidst speculation of corruption within the Karzai camp. After the initial election results were calculated in August roughly one third of Karzai's votes were thrown out by a panel of election monitors, who cited fraud. Since then Abdullah has been calling for reform within the system, including the resignation of many prominent Afghan officials whom he believes enabled the corruption. In his statement, Abdullah said one of his reasons for withdrawing is that his demands were not met within the government in Kabul.
The proceedings in Kabul are being watched closely by the international political community, drawing comments from leading figures such as British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, and US Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. Being only the second election since the fall of the Taliban and with questions of corruption already being raised, many authorities are cynical about whether the outcome will truly be a victory for democracy.
Dr. Abdullah was quick to squash rumors of a boycott and has encouraged his supporters not to demonstrate or incite any violence.
"This is not an exchange for anything from anybody. My decision was purely to give the people of Afghanistan a chance to move on," Abdullah emotionally stated.
The irony in Dr. Abdullah's statement is glaring, as his decision essentially concedes the election to Karzai, who has been president since 2001. The allegations surrounding the first round of elections suggest that Karzai could become a stereotypical Central Asian president-for-life, especially if frustrated reformers such as Abdullah continue to back down.
In light of this, however, outside political leaders remain optimistic--at least publicly.
"We hope to see an Afghan government emerge that responds to the will of the people, that reaches out to all parts of Afghan society, and that is ready to take strong action to meet the challenges that Afghanistan faces," Said British PM Gordon Brown.
The U.N. is working to conclude the elections in as timely a manner as possible, possibly naming Karzai the victor of the presidential race without the second round proceedings.

Young Recruit Killed in Drunk-driving Incident

A teenage army inductee was killed late Wednesday night when he crashed into a bus on Nato Yolu.
Ozan Alparslan, 19, a Cengelkoy resident, had been drinking with his friends before reporting for duty the next day. Due to rain, the roads were very slick and Alparsan was so inebriated that he drove 20 miles over the speed limit. According to the bus driver, the young man was driving on the wrong side of the median when he lost control of the car and crashed his Renault Broadway into the IETT bus which was on its way to the Umraniye bus barn. Both the car and the front of the bus were crushed. Alparslan, who was not wearing a seat belt, was thrown into the windshield and killed instantaneously. Fortunatly, he was the only one in the car. The bus driver, Cem Bayır, was taken to Medicana Hospital and treated for a broken arm. He was released early this morning when he gave his first official statement to the press:
"I saw him coming and tried to avoid the accident by switching to the left lane. Unfortunately, the Renault driver also changed lanes and drove straight into me."

Where Tact and Friendliness Meet.

The United Kingdom is known for many things: its castles, high-class tea-drinking tendencies, and wet weather, to name only a few. But one thing it is not known for is warmth in the characters of its citizens. The British people are usually--if slightly stereotypically--seen as courteous, but stand-offish. The culture is one dependant on subtlety. One must not be too inquisitive or forward; slowly building relationships is not a problem for most people there. Even lifelong friends may outwardly seem to keep each other at arms length. Turks, on the other hand, have little to no inhibitions. Questions such as "how much is your salary" are commonplace and not considered the least offensive, whereas in England such a question could send you to the social death row.
"Turks certainly aren't shy in sharing what they think," said student and two year Istanbul resident Emily Y---. "It's normal to be asked how much money you make, or told that you've gained a few kilos" she laughed.

Turks are also noted for their extravagant hospitality. This is not to say that British people are inhospitable; if they invite you to their homes, they will do their utmost to be good hosts. But Turks carry hospitality to an extreme. "One time my mother was locked out of her house in her pajamas when our neighbour, who was taking out the trash, saw her," related Sarah B---."They had never met before, but our neighbour invited my mother into her home, served her tea and coffee and entertained her until Mom could get back into the house. That would never happen anywhere else!" Turks are known for reaching out to foreigners and being willing to put up with limited language ability.

"My neighbours have been so gracious as I try to communicate with them in my broken Turkish," exclaims middle aged expat Catherine P--. "When we used to live in England, it was very hard to get to know our neighbours, but here they make time for me even though we cannot communicate very well.

Neither cultural norm can be condemned: there is a place for subtlety and for uninhibited friendliness in this world. Perhaps what the world needs is a balance between the two cultures, where people are tactful and courteous, but are always willing to put themselves out for the sake of others if the occasion arises.

Bear family victims of trespassing scandal

Monday afternoon police captured a young blond for trespassing on the Bear family property--she claimed hunger drove her to desperation.

The girl, who authorities only identified as Goldilocks, was discovered after she broke into their Fable street home, ate some food off of their table, broke a chair, and then fell asleep in one of the upstairs beds. Mr and Mrs. Bear, who had been out with their son, were shocked to discover their house in such a state. It was the Young Bear who discovered Goldilocks in the upstairs bedroom, woke her up, and caused her to flee the scene. She was apprehended less than an hour later by local police.

"I am shocked that someone would be so brazen as to break into our house and disturb everything!" Mrs. Bear explained. "It makes me think that the girl may not be quite sane."

Police learned after questioning that Goldilocks was hungry after having walked a long way. They began to question her lucidity after she could offer no explanation for her walk and showed no repentance for her act.

"I had to try all the bowls of porridge and chairs and beds, because I needed it to be just right," she is reported to have said.

Biased verus Unbiased: The Fall Festival

Biased:

On October 24th the Junior and Senior classes of I-- ran the school's first Fall Festival, this year's take on the Spring Carnival. The usual booths were present such as face painting, the pie throw, corn holes and a dunking tank. However they tried to make the atmosphere feel more interesting and like a harvest or Halloween carnival by renaming hackneyed activities and strewing a few Fall decorations around the school grounds.

Carnival-goers had varying reactions to the change in tradition, some complaining that the most attractive parts of the carnival were missing this year.

"My favorite parts were the mural and the Pinewood Derby race," said one I-- youngster. "And those two things were not there this year. It just wasn't as fun."

Due to the chaotic last minute planning of some of the aspects of the festival, a few of the booths were disorganised and unhelpful to Festival attendees.

"The concession stand was crazy!" said high school student Greg P--. "I had to plough through mobs of people to get to the counter, and then they had run out of what I wanted. I suggest they come up with a better system for next year."

While originality is encouraged in I-- students and creativity is always welcomed, the Fall Festival clearly shows that intense planning and prep work are vital. Maybe next year's Carnival organisers will be more willing to adhere to tradition.

Unbiased:

On October 24th the Upperclassmen of I-- hosted their first Fall Festival. Usually, I-- has a Carnival in the Second Semester, but past organisers have found that the Spring is usually overbooked with other end-of-the-year activities, so this year's students chose to move it to the Fall. Taking advantage of the time of year, they chose an Autumn or Harvest theme, modeling it after Fall Festivals commonly seen in the USA.
The Juniors and Seniors worked together to take cliched Carnival activities and make them fit the theme, thereby making them more appealing to the other students. One example is the new twist on the pie throw, where a Festival goer can use pumpkin pulp instead of whipped cream for an extra carnival ticket. They worked hard to decorate the school grounds and the booths, using a pumpkin motif throughout. They also added a costume contest, which delighted children and adults alike.

"My daughter loved creating her costume and dressing up with all her friends!" one I-- mother gushed. "I think it should be a part of every Carnival from now on."

There were a few hiccups, including slight disorganisation involving the concession stand, and a few people missed past components of the Carnival, such as the mural and the Pinewood Derby race. However most attendees just gave high praise for the originality and hard work of the Juniors and Seniors. A lot of fun was had, and many people hope that this year marks the beginning of a new I-- tradition.

Pirate Versus Warship Captain?

If I could choose between being the captain of a pirate ship, or the commander of a warship, I would unhesitatingly choose the buccaneer route. In comparing the two lifestyles, being a pirate is much more appealing. First, you are autonomous; making up the rules as you go, versus being one name in a long chain of military hierarchy. Second, it is much more profitable, though your income is certainly not consistent. Third, the uniforms are far superior. Swashbuckling chic is much more my style than Dress Blues. There is more creativity, less formality, and encouragement for superfluous piercings and tattoos. On reflection, I realised that the relaxed, adventurous life style of a pirate suits my nature much more than that of the rigid military seamen.

What would I want to be doing in 10 years?

Questions like "What do I want to be doing in 10 years" are definitely provocative. Especially when you are forced to go beyond the practical and merely dream. When education and money are out of the way, you are left with the heart of what you want. The funny thing is, what I dream about doing and what I practically intend to do, are exactly the same thing. My whole life I have been fascinated by medicine. The idea of taking away someone's pain, providing healing, always seemed almost miraculous. When I was little and would think about what I wanted to be when I reached that elusive thing called adulthood, I liked to imagine myself as a doctor labouring in lands where no other help exists. The adventure of it thrilled me. And surprisingly, that particular dream never died.

As I have gotten older, I realised that I was created to help people. My heart is directed toward them and I desperately want to heal whatever is hurting them. I have always felt passionate about countries where people die every day because they cannot have that kind of help. We keep it from them, without excuse. Maybe this is my way of apologising to those people on behalf of the rest of the Western world. Somehow, I want to right the wrong and introduce some justice into this fallen universe.

My actual plan is to major in nursing and probably get a masters degree. Then I will wait and see which doors open. I believe that God has called me to minister to people by healing their bodies before I offer balm to their souls. And I know that the God who created me for this purpose will be faithful and lay out the way for me to carry out His plan.